Trying to believe it Tuesday…

So…the votes yesterday were split about 60/40.

59% said GIRL.

41% said BOY.

Welp.

59% of you were 1/2 right (don’t try to do that math; your brain could explode).

Here’s the bag that our sonogram pictures came in.

pink bag

Pink for GIRL, right?

Sort of.

You see, here’s one of the pictures IN the pink bag.

BABY GIRL TWINS_45

(And, no, you didn’t just develop double vision; that really is two babies in there).

So…apparently, it was pink for girlS.

Because that’s what we are having, people.

INDENTICAL. TWIN. GIRLS.

You go ahead and gasp. And I’ll wait right here while you pick your jaw up off the ground.

I’m still stepping on my own lip a bit.

Sort of.

{Imma ‘bout to go into story-telling mode, so if all you came for were the results, feel free to shut your computer and go get a bagel or something}.

You see, waaaaay back when we had our first midwife appointment, she measured me and said, “Huh.”

And then she called in her assistant who measured me and said, “Hmmm…”

And I said, “What exactly are y’all huh-ing and hmmming about anyway?”

And they both said, “Weeeell, you’re measuring kind of big for 10 weeks.”

And I said, “Big for whom?”

Because, the thing is, I carry small. Even when I cranked out a 9 lb. 2 oz., 23 3/4” baby (that would be Simon, my second-born), I only ever made it to barely 40 cm (and he was two weeks late).

And with Della, well, I pretty much constantly got this reaction: “You’re how far along? But, but, but…your belly’s so small!”

Here I am at 1 week shy of 6 months pregnant with Della (Isn’t the fact that Simon is doing chest press with me with a mini-barbell just the cutest?)

pregnant flat belly

(This is not our house; we were on vacation in Arkansas; although, why I didn’t figure out a way to stuff that lovely, tweedy plaid couch with the ruffled skirt in the back of the van while I still had the chance, I’ll never know)

What can I say? I’m long-waisted, I carry low, and I don’t carry big.

And I’m good with that.

It makes my life easier. I can exercise like a nut right up ‘til the end, and I never feel horribly, achingly uncomfortable (though, considering that both of my last two were two weeks late, I did feel a little like swallowing a strongly worded eviction notice with a castor oil chaser by about 41 weeks).

But my midwives told me they weren’t using my unusual measurements as a guide. My uterus was measuring big in comparison with anybody.

GULP.

Fast-forward to my next two appointments.

Everybody seemed to have forgotten that whole “measuring big” thing, and when I insisted on multiple people repeatedly measuring me for confirmation, everybody said, “Uh, no. You’re good. Everything’s normal.”

Last time when I went in at almost 18 weeks, I was measuring at 17 cm (for those who don’t know…you’re supposed to measure approximately 1 cm. per week pregnant).

PHEW!

We were in the clear!

Of course, that didn’t explain the unusually strong nausea and exhaustion (for me) that I experienced for the first 12 weeks of the pregnancy.

Or the fact that my belly is actually showing, when it wasn’t at this point last time.

Or the fact that my weight gain has been higher than normal despite generally healthy eating, lots of exercise, and the fact that I can still wear practically all of my clothes.

Or the fact that I’m having lots of worrisome aches and pains that I didn’t usually get until month 7 with my other kids.

OR the fact that as the girls (YIKES!) have started moving more, there have been times that it’s almost seemed as if I’ve felt kicks on opposing sides of my abdomen. (Guess it wasn’t almost after all).

It’s kind of like in Luke 2:19, when it says, “And Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart…”

NOT to compare my experience of finding out I’m having twins with the virgin birth in any way other than to say that all these quirky little differences were piling up quietly in the back of my mind so that, when our sono technician made the first swipe of the wand across my belly to spread the gel out a little more, and I caught a glimpse of tangled arms and legs and what looked like not one but two little round heads…

I knew.

And I wasn’t even that surprised, even though we have almost no history of multiples in either of our families.

My husband just kept staring and saying, “Whaaaaaat?”

And rubbing my leg while he cast anxious glances my way.

And the technician said, “Well, it looks like you’re getting two for the price of one. And you’re so calm!”

And I really was.

But 9 weeks ago, when my midwives said I was measuring big, I was not calm.  In fact, I was pretty panicked.

Because here’s the deal:

We’re kind of weird when it comes to birth control.

As in…we don’t use it at all and never have.

That might not surprise you too much considering that I’m 29-years-old and pregnant with my 4th (as far as we knew) child.

But it still makes us a bit on the freak side when it comes to childbearing.

And I’m (mostly) okay with that. (Although, being thought a freak is something that’s hard to be completely okay with ever).

I’m very used to the raised eyebrows when people assume that we’re “done” having kids, and I say something like, “No, we’ll probably have more.”

I’m used to the pitying glances at the grocery store, and the pretty much constant, “Whoa! You’ve got your hands full, bless your heart.” (And that’s with “only” three).

But we have very specific reasons for foregoing BC—the chief of which are 1) the conviction that God is sovereign and the author of every event in our lives, including how many children we have and when and 2) strong concerns about the side effects and potential abortifacient properties of chemical birth control.

But that’s not what this post is about at all, so if you want to know more about my “why,” feel free to email me using the button on the right sidebar, and I’ll talk more “in person.”

In fact, I only bring this up now because I wanted to illustrate something.

I’ve always been open to having lots of kids. We have no objections to natural family planning, but we really kind of stink at it…mostly due to a rather irregular cycle on my part and the fact that I tend to only get one normal cycle after breastfeeding to “reset” everything before I end up pregnant again (I can still remember reading books about the “rules” for naturally tracking your ovulation and how they were really consistent “except in times of breastfeeding,” and thinking, “Oh shoot. I’m in trouble!” : )).

But despite my openness, there has consistently been one thing that I have asked (no begged) God not to give me, and the conversation has always gone a little something like: “Lord, please. You know that it’s a sacrifice for me to say that I’m willing to have as many kids are you’ll give me, even though I’m not really a ‘kid person’ or a natural ‘mothering’ sort. Just please…PLEASE…give them to me one at a time. If I have twins, I’m serious. I might die.”

That may sound a tad dramatic, and I know plenty of people who say things like, “But I think twins would be FUN!” in bright, chirpy voices, but I’ll admit that my mental response has always gone a little something like: “Exactly what baby-fever-inducing crack have you been smoking??!”

I mean, I get the cute matching clothes and all.

But constant diaper changes?

Fun?

Trying to coordinate two sleeping schedules?

Fun?

ROUND THE CLOCK nursing?

FUN????

Not in my dictionary.

After all, I’m already being obedient in a way that’s hard for me because I meant it when I said my prayers included that bit about not being a natural mothering sort.

Don’t get me wrong.

I loooooooove my kids.

Like to distraction.

I can’t (and do not want to) imagine life without them and would not trade them on their most annoying, snotty, drive-me-crazy-behavior days for any treasure in the world.

But I’m not that girl who dreamed of having babies.

Or loves to help out in the infant nursery.

Kids. are. hard.

(Can I get an amen?)

One at a time, they’re excruciatingly, frustratingly, over-the-top, maddeningly…HARD.

One at a time, they require every single ounce of patience, forbearance, and love that I can muster pretty much every single day.

And some days, when the last ounce is squeezed out, it still doesn’t seem like enough for them…one at a time.

But MORE THAN ONE at a time?

It almost seems cruel.

Like God is baiting me or something.

(Really, God, FIVE under SEVEN before I’m 30? You do realize I can’t care for my children if I’m in a mental institution, right?).

Or it would have seemed that way before I actually saw my sweet girls’ faces on the sonogram (they have dimples) and witnessed one of them elbowing her sister in the nose (how much you wanna bet that won’t be the only time?).

In that moment, when my biggest mothering fear (other than the death or serious illness of my children, of course) became a reality, all I could do was watch the screen in wonder, my mind racing with possibilities for names that weren’t too cutesy but still went well together (if they start with the same initial, it will only be because I happened to like names with the same beginning letter, NOT because I planned it that way).

Because God’s smart (and gracious) like that.

He knows how to ease us into something we were sure we could never handle and didn’t want (remember all those little “clues” piling up in the back of my mind?)—to overwhelm us with awe at the exact moment when we should be weeping on the floor.

Will I spend some time on the floor in a puddle of tears?

I have no doubt whatsoever.

Do I have a clue how I’m going to juggle homeschooling and 5 children—two of whom are infants (notice I didn’t say a word about blogging, teaching fitness classes, cooking, cleaning, or, oh yeah, breathing)?

No. Not one single clue.

But does the thought of identical twin daughters still thrill me down to my very tippy-toes?

Yeah, it kind of does.

And that, my friends, is an absolute miracle.

P.S. Every indication on the sonogram is that both girls are 100% healthy and perfect! (Praise Jesus!!!!!)

P.P.S. I’ve been pretty raw here, and I’m aware that some of what I’ve said may puzzle, annoy, and/or offend some of you. That makes me a little sick to my stomach. But I felt a conviction for you to understand where I’m coming from in this area, so please understand it’s hard for me and go easy on me if possible.

P.P.P.S. I you are a mom of multiples, PLEASE email me and let me know I’m not going to die. (If you think I am going to die, please DON’T email me!). I hear there are communities for us crazies and that some forums even have clothes-swaps for twins, etc., which sounds pretty stinkin’ cool. I’m totally new to the world of multiples (obviously) and could use all the help I can get!

P.P.P.P.S. Wanna get a glimpse of what their nursery will look like?

Here you go:

lacework

 The CSI project ~ Menu Plan Monday ~ C.R.A.F.T.  ~ The Southern Institute ~ Making the World Cuter ~ Thrify Décor Chick ~ Metamorphosis Monday ~ Sumo Sweet Stuff ~ Gunny Sack ~ Singing Three Little Birds ~DIY Homes Sweet Home ~ Dittle Dattle ~ 1929 Charmer ~ Everything Under the Moon  ~ ModMix Monday ~ Sew Stylish ~ Coastal Charm ~ Under the Table and Dreaming

Tuesday ~ Get Your Craft ~ Tip Junkie ~ Blackberry Vine ~ Crafty Confessions ~ Me & my Boys ~ A Bowl Full of Lemons ~ Home Stories A-Z ~ My Uncommon Slice of Suberbia  ~ Carolyn’s Homework ~ Sugar Bee Crafts ~ House of Grace ~ Passionately Artisitc ~ My World Made by Hand ~ Uncommon Designs ~ Trendy Treehouse

Wednesday ~ Blue Cricket Design ~ Somedays Crafts ~ Sew Much Ado ~ Sew Woodsy ~ Handy Man, Crafty Woman ~ Savvy Southern Style ~ {Primp} ~ Midweek Fiesta ~ Rae Gun Ramblings ~ Polkadots On Parade ~ Lollipop Cards ~ JAQS Studio ~ Let Birdz Fly ~ Let Birdz Fly ~ My Girlish Whims

Thursday ~ Thursdays are Your Days, Transformation Thursdays ~ Somewhat simple ~ Show off your stuff ~ House of Hepworths ~ Delightful Order ~ My Simple Home Life ~ The Frugal Girls ~ Thrifty Thursday ~ DIY Diva Thursday ~ Tablescape Thursday ~ No Minimalists Here ~ Crafty, Scrappy, Happy ~ Thrifty Decorating ~ Between U and Me ~ 36th Avenue

Friday ~ The Shabby nest  ~ Show and Tell Friday ~ Finding Fabulous ~ I’m Loving it ~ Simply Sweet Home ~ Whipper Berry ~ Chic on a Shoestring decorating ~ Spunky Junky ~ Delicate Construction ~ Homemaker in Heels ~ Family Ever After~ French Country Cottage ~ Common Ground ~ Young And Crafty ~ At the Picket Fence ~ Fingerprints on the Fridge ~ Miss Mustard Seed ~ Addicted to Decorating ~Bacon Time with The Hungry Hypo ~ Making Lemonade ~ I Can’t Stop Crafting ~ Over the Big Moon ~ Shabby Art ~ Answer is Chocolate

Saturday ~ I heart nap time- Sundae Scoop ~ Tatertots and Jello ~ Be different Act Normal ~ Funky Junk ~ 2805 ~ Making Lemonade Blog ~I am Along for the Ride  ~ Lolly Jane

 

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106 thoughts on “Trying to believe it Tuesday…

  1. As a woman who will turn 30 this year and has longed for a child for years now, I can’t help but have jealous thoughts. But our sovereign God has such different paths for us all and He is good in them all! congratulations on your twin girls. They are beautiful- as are your other children. I found your blog from Biblical Homemaking’s blog (love her). I too am a GF instructor/Personal Trainer. :) I enjoy your quirkiness and honesty and plan to continue reading. God bless.

  2. I wholeheartedly agree with your reasons behind not using birth control. It’s actually refreshing to hear someone who feels that way about it. The more I learn about the side effects, the scarier it becomes. And like you, I believe God knows what He’s doing when He blesses people with children and He always provides. Always. This coming from a girl who’s the 5th of 9 children. And a girl who’s happy my parents didn’t decide they wanted only 4. :)

  3. Whaaahoo! We, being identical twin sisters, know you are going to LOOOOVE it! Of course the first year you’ll be in “survival mode” BUT hopefully their older siblings will help out a bit (fetching diapers, wipes, paci’s, etc.) and pretty soon you’ll get your routine down and life will be good again ;) Best of luck and CONGRATS!!!! xoxo

  4. Oh friend, you are going to be an awesome momma to twins!! God knew. Oh yes, He did!

    I’m so happy for you!! And, I’m sure the past 97 comments have been full of inspiring words, so I’ll just skip straight to the superficial and say YAY to that Amy Butler pattern!! I can’t remember if that’s in her wallpaper or fabric line, but, either way, it’s fab!! I CANNOT wait to see how the nursery comes together! It’ll be perfect, I’m certain! :)

  5. I’m totally late, but I am SO EXCITED for you. What an amazing and beautiful announcement. Sure it’s scary exciting, but it’s also sweet exciting. I pray that your pregnancy is smooth and uneventful and that your beautiful little girls arrive safely. There is no doubt that you will be a wonderful Mom to them. God bless you as you prepare. I love all of your sharing. :)

  6. I enjoyed reading this, a really honest post. Although I have some different views to you I’m not offended in anyway and find it inspiring that you are so sure of yourself and your beliefs.

    One thing I totally agree on is that God has a plan for each of us and knows what’s best for us even if we don’t agree at the time!
    When I had just got married I was called as the Primary President at the church I go to, which meant looking after 15-20 kids for 2 hours each Sunday, and I’m like you – not the natural mothering kind! So there was me at 19 yrs old, newly married, at university, working part-time, trying to look after other peoples children and having to instruct two other people (who actually were mothers) on what needed to be done. Plus organise activities, nativity, in charge of record keeping and financing…etc…
    When Bishop asked if I would accept the calling I really didn’t think it was a good idea, I couldn’t see how I could do it, but I new the Bishop wouldn’t ask me if he didn’t know I was able.
    It was the best thing ever, I gained great friends in the women who supported me, I learnt to be organised (a big challenge for me!), I grew to love each child and gained knowledge that will be invaluable when I have my own children, and most importantly I grew closer to God because I had to rely on him so much during that time.

    I’ve been told that our greatest challenges are also our greatest blessings and I truly believe that!

    mrslauralynn.blogspot.co.uk

  7. Well, I just think this is glorious news! I don’t know if anyone has mentioned this, but supposedly Mother Theresa said, “I know God won’t give me more than I can handle, I just wish He didn’t trust me so much!” He trusts you, He trusts you! My brother has twins and it is truly not double the “trouble,” but exponentially the trouble (don’t do the math on that either!) :) Your “big kids” will be such a help though! My mom had 6 kids in 7 1/2 yrs, no multiples; I can remember changing diapers – you CAN do the math on that! Mom also earned a PhD and a JD — we used to joke after 6 teenagers she got empty nest syndrome in spades! I know how you feel about natural family planning, we sucked at it too – but I have a funny heart so we didn’t end up with six. And I know there are all kinds of nursing twins simultaneously things and they’ll probably have pretty close sleeping schedules if you keep them together (she wrote, in a way filled with hope), and the clothing swaps are supposed to be wonderful – they didn’t let singlets in around here so we just envied from a distance! Just please, please, do not name them Rachel and Leah! How about Elizabeth and Ann? They go together in the bible and smart people would get it! :)

  8. Wow, wow, WOW! That’s crazy, Abbie!! Congratulations, seriously – congratulations. And I say that with all of the fear and trembling in my heart that the thought of twins bring on. :)

    But the matching? And the IDENTICALNESS?? And the adorable names???? It will all be so worth it.

  9. I love your prayer: “Lord, please. You know that it’s a sacrifice for me to say that I’m willing to have as many kids are you’ll give me, even though I’m not really a ‘kid person’ or a natural ‘mothering’ sort. Just please…PLEASE…give them to me one at a time. If I have twins, I’m serious. I might die.” It seems every time I tell God I’m “never” going to do something, that’s exactly what He sends my way, like getting married, having kids(my own surprises after God seemed to hit up upside the head with a major chemical birth control conviction), owning a minivan…ok maybe the last one doesn’t count. And you know, after I’ve pulled myself off the floor and cleaned the snotty, teary mess off of my face, I’ve never looked back with regret for embracing whatever direction God chooses to lead. Jeremiah 29:11-13. Thanks for having the guts to share your story and your heart. Oh, and congratulations!!!

  10. Welcome to the club! :) My identical twin girls are 10 now, and they are just as much fun now as they were when they were little. I’ve got lots of advice for you if you need it (later), but you’re already a mama three times over…you’ll be fine! What an awesome blessing from God!

  11. Yea – so awesome! I am so excited for you. I’m not really the mothering type either, but six kids later, I can say that we are hanging in there! Every morning I give myself a pep talk borrowed from a friend: “By God’s grace, and for His glory…” and every day truly is. You’ll do great! I love the nursery fabric – can’t wait to see it come together.

  12. YEAAAAA! Congratulations on two little girls!!! That is awesome! God is blessing your family and these little girls are so incredibly blessed to have two loving parents!!! You will do great!
    Although I hear you on the baby issue. I loved my babies to death but couldn’t wait for them to get older and start walking and using the bathroom:-)

  13. Congratulations! As an older mom of 7, I can remember having 4 kids age 6 and under and the crazy comments we would get from people at times. After having 3 more, I can’t tell you how many times elderly men and women have stopped us in a store, out on a walk, just all over the place and given us this advice…..”Enjoy them, Enjoy them, Enjoy them.” They are grown and gone before you know it and you will treasure each and every moment (that you can remember) with them! Now that my oldest is 24 and I am watching my 5 year old grow every time I blink, that’s all I can think about. SO enjoy every second of this stage and all the ones to come!

  14. How blessed! I only have 4 singletons but I have found that pairing the 8 yr old with the 2 year old (he helps him get dressed put his shoes on etc..this took a lot of training) and the 6 yr old with the baby (he doesn’t do so much but loves the little responsibilities…watches him while I run to get something or fetches diapers) I’m sure it’ll all work out especially since you seem to be confident about where you’ll be getting your strength (husbands are good but God is a thousand times better). These girlies will be a great addition to your troops. congratulations

  15. Oh honey, I am beyond thrilled for you! Your post was so beautiful and so real. You don’t have to justify your choices to anyone (but God of course and I think your fine on that account!). I wish you health during this pregnancy and delivery and much joy and happiness with those beautiful, identical, twin girls! Thanks for being raw and real, it’s why we love you and your blog. What you said about God was so true and applies to all of us no matter what our circumstances, thank you for being such a good messenger of His word!

  16. Amen!! We may not always understand it but God always has a plan. I love your honesty and I think this world needs more of it. If anyone thinks what you wrote is offensive then they need to look closer in the mirror. Everyone has their stuff and many of us don’t have the guts to admit it. The fact that you are acknowledging theses things about yourself shows a lot about your character. How can we work on ourselves if we live in denial? Congrats to you and your family! Those are two VERY blessed little girls!!

  17. Congratulations to you, I am a new follower (maybe a few months) and love your blog. God is so good, even though right now it seems like a joke.

  18. Oh my goodness! You are taking the news of having twins extremely well! I think I would follow your original thoughts. I. Would. Die. But at the same time, what an amazing blessing!! Can’t wait to read more of your journey!

  19. Oh my goodness! Twins! I’m so excited for you! Just think of all the grace God is going to pour out on you and them as you learn to be a mama to five tiny children!

  20. I was the girl who wanted to have lots of babies….. but like you, one at a time. I was the lady who never used the pill etc., ever, and I have 6 kids to prove it. And on occasion I was the middle aged woman who thought, could God’s sense of humor be that funny to have me eek one more out at my age? I think I have safely passed that point, but I’ll miss those baby bearing years till I’m a very old woman. I’m filled with anticipation for you.

    ~Bliss~
    (#6 was a twin, lost the other at about 12 weeks)

  21. Congratulations, Abbie! What a shock! =) One day you [may] look back and say, “Well, that wasn’t so bad!” — but it might be AFTER they hit the teen years! =)

  22. Congrats Abbie!! I am SO happy for you!!! It’s going to be tough, but I have no doubt you are going to do it. Too bad we don’t live closer, cause the girls and I would babysit for you! The nursery looks pretty too, I love the colors!!

  23. Oh my! How life can surprise and shock. How it can push us down by the shoulders straight to our knees. And what a good position to be in…I pray that your heart is fine tuned to hear and follow the voice of your Master and that you learn a new dimension of His provision and great love for you. May you leave a legacy of grace and mercy that continues for generations to come. And may these little girls know their Creator in the deepest way possible and follow Him all theirs lives!

  24. Double AMEN! This is so exciting and GOd really does know how to get us where we need to be with him in ways we would never have used! Enjoy the journey and don’t worry about us…. we’ll stay with you no matter what!
    Kim@reposhture.blogspot.com

  25. Congratulations! I’m a mom of a 3 year old and 5 month old twins. You can do this! :) For us, we needed a solid 3 months to learn to juggle 2 babies, but a schedule does come and life gets somewhat predictable again.

    I agree, a schedule was real important for our sanity! When one eats, they both do. When one goes down for a nap, they both do.

    I recommend buying 2 boppy loungers. We love them! They can sit in the pillows to eat, hang out, and they (the pillows) move around easy.

  26. I scrolled right down to the ultrasound (that’s the nurse in me), and said, “Oh, dear Lord” when I saw the twins. *laugh* My younger brothers are twins, and we all survived the experience just fine… my mom is still (mostly) sane, now that they’re 28. ;) Something that I think she benefited from greatly was the local Mothers of Twins Club (do they have those elsewhere/still?). It was a great support group, and they “got” the challenges of raising twins the way no others did. She’s still close friends with a lot of those ladies to this day. We were also fortunate enough to have a family member who’d had twins a bit before she did, so we got some great hand-me-downs. (I say we, like I had much of anything to do with it. Ha.)

    Also, not to touch on a, er, touchy subject, but although I disagree with you 100% on your stance on birth control, I completely respect your honesty and forthright expression of your feelings on the matter! I’m not mentioning this to disagree or pick a fight, but since you seemed concerned you’d offend folks, I just wanted to chime in that from someone who’s at the exact opposite end of the spectrum – I did not find anything offensive here at all. I personally have no desire to have children (at the age of 36), but I am so, so, so darn happy for you and your impending bundles of joy! Congratulations!

  27. Congrats! Just know you are not alone with your feelings. I’m 36 weeks pregnant with boy/girl twins and have every emotion in the book (except I really wouldn’t mind not being pregnant about now). :) You will be amazing! Good luck with everything.

  28. Oh sister! What a wonderful way God has eased you into this. I will continue to lift you up as you will certainly be a busy mom. and if you need free psych help, well give me a call i can use the practice ;-) but seriously you will find a way with God’s help and he will richly bless you indeed.

  29. Totally agree with Bethany on the entertaining each other…I had a singleton after my twins and at times I kind of feel sorry for him since he’s got to do so many things by himself. The twins always bathed together, slept together, rolled around on each other, and got into mischief together (by helping one another do things like drag chairs, open windows, etc). Look for interaction to really step up after their first birthday – that’s when it gets really interesting!

  30. Abbie! I’m so very excited and happy for you! As the mother of twin 7-year old boys (and a 2 year old boy on top of that), I’m here to tell you that you DO survive and even thrive! Just when you think you CAN’T do any more, somehow, someway, you do. For me it was both fear and overwhelming joy mixed together all the time, which is weird but amazing. If I can give you any advice at all, it’s to get those babies on a schedule and stick like glue for the first few months. If one eats, the other eats, wake her up if you have to. I would pump after everyone had eaten so that I could build up a little “stash” of milk and that way someone else (Dad, Grandma) could take an occasional feeding and let me sleep. Change one then change the other, even if she seems dry. They will adapt so fast and you’ll find that you can plan your life around it so much better once they do. Be kind to yourself and *no feeling guilty* when looking around at whatever disaster the other kiddos left behind – it’s all minor compared to the amazing work you’re doing when you’re holding and loving your babies.

    Oh, and get two identical electronic glider swings, the kind that will swing side to side or back and forth. Use them! There were some days that those swings were the only thing that would soothe them.

    I love your blog and I’m so glad I found you this winter! Congratulations to you and “Ryan!” ;)

    PS: My dear friend had identical girls who were sooo identical that she was afraid she would mix them up, so she always dressed one in pink and the other purple. She would even put a little dab of polish on their tiny toenails so there would not be any mistakes. My guys are fraternal so not a problem for me, although I too color-coded their things so they didn’t swap sippy cups, binkies, etc. Nick always got green, Nate always got red.

  31. Wow! Congrats! You are a tough woman & right that you are being given this (double) miracle because you CAN handle it and will enjoy your twin baby girls :-)

  32. I am a huge fan of your blog and just want to tell you congratulations! What a wonderful blessing and although it does seem overwhelming I am sure, don’t forget that God will only give you what you can handle..I truly believe that..even if “handling” something means spending the day on the couch a bit in tears. Next day..get up and move on. See? Handled! Best of luck!

  33. I love this post. Congratulations on your blessings. They are form God and He isn’t going to give you something you truly cannot handle. He will only give these blessings to those He sees fit. You feel the same as I do about loving your child to pieces but some days are just so hard. I only have one and my husband wants another. In my mind I want to give him another but on the days when my daughter is acting a fool, I tell him it’s not gonna happen and he can forget about it. I think I did mention to him, if I found out I was pregnant with multiples he would find me in a corner in the fetal position crying my eyes out. So happy for you and I know you can do it. You were meant for this.

  34. Oh good golly! I really did have to pick up my jaw off the floor! Congratulations! What a sweet surprise and major blessing! God is so good! Prayers for a healthy pregnancy and healthy baby girls!

  35. Congratulations on your exciting news!! I am a new mom to identical twin girls (just turned 9 months old). My husband and I were shocked and scared at the news of twins. We had no idea how it was going to work out. I changed maybe 3 diapers in my entire life before I had the girls. I knew that God gave us twins for a reason and let me tell you I would not change a thing. Dealing with 2 is really not as bad as people think. I honestly have had people tell me “that twins (or multiples of any kinds) would be awful” and “better you than me”. Yes the middle of the night feedings are hard but the key is to get on the same schedule. Feed them both at the same time then lay them for naps at the same time and they will catch on. It is almost like they know life will be easier for everyone if they fall into a routine. It will take awhile but much easier to handle once the routine is set.

    My best piece of advice would be to find a Multiples Group in your area. They women will have great advice and be very supportive. Check out this website, it should be very helpful http://www.nomotc.org/

    To be honest, if we decide to expand our family I would love to have another set of multiples!

    Good Luck and I can’t wait to see updates!

  36. I have a friend who has two sets of twins and boy did it look rough! She did survive though, and I am pretty sure you will too. I am banking on it because I yours is one of my favorite blogs! Congrats and good luck!

  37. Congratulations!!…from a fellow mommy of identical twin girlies. :) My son was almost 2 when I found out at 5 months that I was carrying twins. They are turning two next week…and I’ve survived!! I really can’t imagine if I’d had more than one already as mothering 3 under 3 was CRAZY!! But, honestly, I’d do it again, and am secretly hoping I can have twins or triplets next time around…so maybe I have gone crazy from it all! lol It is a TON OF FUN!! I’m starting potty training this week, though, soooo….we’ll see!!
    Anyhow, I’m super excited for you! Also, I’ve written some short articles on my blog if you are interested. :)

  38. I have a 5-month-old baby girl. My whole life I always wanted twins, that is, until I actually had a baby. It’s hard work. But, when I really ponder it, I smile at the wonder and amazement of people having twins. Congrats, x2.

  39. Well, you’ll only hear positive things from me!! I love it that you’re having twins. And, I wholeheartedly support you and your convictions. My twins have been such a gift, I cannot imagine life without them. You will get through it…God is molding you as clay in the potter’s hand…it’s all part of His plan to grow you more like Him. May God bless your days, months, and years ahead as you adjust to having twins join your family. I love the scripture that Megan posted in 1 Kings 18…you’re called and will be equipped by the One who made you. Love, Kathy

  40. Hi! AnnMarie sent me your blog= I had twin boys (#4 and 5) 11 months ago (just now starting to sink in) and would love to chat and encourage you! Your thoughts made me think you had read my brain about a year ago, and I knew from week 12….I nursed my boys too-currently weaning them. YOU CAN DO IT! It takes alot of prayer and a good sense of humor! You’ll redefine busy, but you’ll be happy. Drop me a line! mhurrywoods@hotmail.com
    xo- Mary Woods

  41. I’ll give you an AMEN, SISTAH!!! And, of course congratulations. My sister was on her 9th pregnancy (of singles) when she had fraternal TRIPLETS! Howdy – ho! And, my 2 youngest are almost twins. :-) But identical twin girls! How exciting!!!! :-) There will be days, but God is good.

  42. Whenever I say “never”, that is what happens… I’ve learned to eliminate that from my vocabulary!!!

    Congrats, Abbie! You will be an incredible mother to your sweet twin girls, I have no doubt…

  43. CONGRATS chick, I am absolutely positive that you will do great with your three kiddos and your to be twins. I am glad that I checked in today to get this update. :) I am super excited for you and can’t wait to see the nursery finished.

    BTW: My chin did hit the floor from viewing your sono pic. =)

  44. Exciting~ My hubs amd I had our first baby when we were just 20 our second when we were 21 and 3 and 4 ~yup identical twin boys when we were 23. So we now have an 8 year old a 6 year old and two 5 year olds. We feel amazingly blessed! I was strangly calm when the doc told me twins and we found out at my first appointment. I was 7 weeks preg. and feeling lots of movement. Ultrasound to check how far along I was showed two babes! It’s not as hectic as you are imagining. I nursed the boys at the same time and woke one if the other woke, to keep them on the same schedule. Good luck and congrats!

  45. Having twins is an ABSOLUTE BLAST! Our twin girls are 10 months, and I’ve been loving every minute. I don’t have any older children, so I don’t know if that would make it harder or easier (maybe they love to ‘help’?), but having twins is FARRRRRR easier than people make it sound. They entertain each other from day one! If you have ANY questions at all, or if you just need to vent (!!), email me at sawdustandembryos.@gmail.com. Or you can snoop around my blog http://www.sawdustandembryos.com where I’m very open about the ups and downs of my life as a parent of twins and a designer! Congrats on the HAPPY NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!

  46. how refreshingly honest!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Being a mama is soooo hard!!!!!! Congrats so happy for you from Dublin, Ireland!! You will cope amazingly well!! Don’t mind the negative comments about “hands full” and all that jazz!! There are couples out there that would love to hold one precious LO in their arms and you are so lucky to hold three and two little ones in the safest place two babies can be, in their mama’s tummy :) so happy for you both!! You can start up your own band or small soccer team :)

  47. My husband is an identical twin. He is (with Clark) also #4 & 5 in his family. My mother-in-law was quite surprised and really, really worried! Her parents came to stay for the few months, and she said it really helped her get through the hard times. She said it wasn’t the twins that were so hard to manage but keeping up with the other kids. She says (after the first 3 months) the twins were HANDS DOWN, far and away her easiest kids to raise! You can do this! The Lord wouldn’t give you anything you can’t handle!

  48. PRAISE THE LORD (x2)!!! :) Congratulations, Abbie! I’ve been a long time follower, although anonymously mostly because I just don’t have time to comment… barely get the time to read! But I love your blog! You are an inspiration! I am just shy of 30 and have 5 sweet little ones. 1 oldest daughter and 4 boys… all under the age of 7.(hence the lack of time- also homeschool) I could have written your post (if I was in your shoes) I can TOTALLY sympathize with you! Remember that when we are WEAK… then HE is strong. He LOVES you!!
    Maybe it’s where I live (montana) but I’ve noticed that people like to see me out with my kids and make nice comments about how beautiful they are and how good I look for having 5 kids… I think they just enjoy seeing a happy mom with happy kids that don’t have snotty noses and look like they’ve been in the same clothes all week. I think our testimony when we are out with our kids is super important. Even our apperance matters. To show God is taking care of us and our husbands are too. :) (Just my thoughts and observation)
    Also…. a great book, if you haven’t heard of it is by: Rachel Jankovic called “Loving the Little Years”. She is a young mom with 5 kids (the last two twins) and now is pregnant with her sixth. It is a very encouraging read for any mom in the “trenches” and veeery practical and humorously written. She also blogs along with her mom and sister at feminagirls.com. (under the pen name “Lizzie”)

  49. Congratulations! As the mother of 10 year old twin girls you are truly blessed. I had my twin girls first, therefore, I didn’t know what it was like to have just one baby. It will be a little more work for you especially with three other children, but you get used to it. For the first 6 months it felt like all I did was nurse and change diapers, but I really miss those days. It is a blessing to watch them grow and even though they have moments when they fight with each other, they always stick up for each other and share a bond that only twins can relate to. Good luck and God Bless.

  50. so freakin excited for y’all!! not just because they are twins or my mouth did drop to the ground, but because how you saw God working these things in and FOR you! kids are hard, and anyone who says they aren’t i truely believe either has never HAD kids, or their kids are grown and they have FORGOTTEN those hard moments. just remember use your support system, my aunt tried to do it all herself and that is one thing she said she would do over, use the support system of her friends and family. yay!!

  51. Congratulations Abbie!!!! I’m just marveling at the abundance of God’s blessing!! I was actually very, very afraid that my 4th pregnancy was twins for most of the reasons you listed. By the time we had the sonogram, I was completely adjusted to the idea, and was actually a little disappointed when we found out it was just one. :) I’m an anomaly in the world, in that I’m 33 years old and have never used artificial bc my whole life. I start to feel very alone (well, with my husband of course) in that practice. I’m always overjoyed to find out others believe the same way we do. Children are HARD, but they are 100% blessing. Never has any mother on her deathbed said “I wish I had fewer children.” I’m reminded of my grandmother, herself mother to 11 children and grandmother to 49 of us! When she passed away several years ago, her hospital room was FILLED to bursting with people that loved her and were praying for her as she left this world. THAT is how I want to leave this world, with a legacy of love made manifest in a human family. Each child is a gift NOT ONLY given to me by God, but the gift of another everlasting and precious person by me (and my husband) TO God! A person created in His image and likeness, who’s very existence gives Him glory! God bless you for being open to more children!

  52. Abbie, precious, you have once again expressed thoughts I have had but could not put into words. I have at one time been utterly convinced of a certain path my life would take but the the world shifted, and a road I thought I absolutely could not bear turned out to be the greatest route I could have taken. Why? Bcause it wasn’t my choice. It turned out I was getting in my own way. I’m good at that. God’s plan is bigger than my own (I forget that I lot). I am so happy for you. Your boys will suddenly find themselves outnumbered. There could be some good entertainment in that.

  53. Ok. 1) How did I miss that you were even pregnant?! I follow you pretty closely and this got past me! 2) Don’t freak out. I TOTALLY understand where you are coming from on the wanting them one at a time thing. I cried & cried & cried the day I found out (by myself too because I had no clue they were going to do an ultrasound at my first appointment, but they did because things weren’t adding up, hence the two babies at once factor) because I did not want two babies at once. I was 5-6 weeks at that point and they made me come back three weeks later to confirm it was still two and for those three weeks I kept praying it would be just one when I went back. Doesn’t that sound horrible?! When it was still two, I was okay and today? I can’t imagine having only one of my girls. I can’t imagine what it was like for you to find out this far into it that you are having twins…I’m glad I knew from the get-go at least! Two babies will be hard, you will cry in a puddle at times and get all kinds of crazy comments from others (especially being so young with so many kids. I was 24 with three kids not even two & under when the girls were born. We want a big family as well, one more at least, but I’m so scared to try again for the fact that it’s more likely to get twins again! Please let me know if you need anything, want to talk ever…I’m here! Praying for you and those sweet baby girls!

  54. Woohoo! Congratulations! I’m super excited for you! Having 5 kids rocks! (well, ya, except for all the tough stuff, but tough stuff come with having 1 kid, 2, kids, 5 kids….you know what I mean). I love having my 5. Best part is…in your house, the girls will now out number the boys! They are toast when it comes to a voting situation! We are the underdogs in our house…4 boys, 3 girls. I want a girl animal to even it out. lol I will be praying for you!

    –Katie

  55. EEEKKKK!!! Congratulations! What a blessing…I have friends that thought they were pregnant with #4 but found out it was # 4 & 5…they are PRECIOUS!!

  56. Wowsa!!!! I took one look at that ultrasound and said…..”Oh my!!”. But seriously, huge CONGRATS to you and your family! Loved everything you said and your testimony about how the Lord prepared you already and I truly believe he will prepare you for everything ahead of you as well :) Double Blessings that for sure!!
    We had some friends who just had twin boys (#3 & #4 in their family). She said she had a maternity shirt that listed 5 things not to say to a mom preggo with twins…..one of them was “Glad it is you not me”. I was cracking up because I was pretty sure I said that to them at least once!
    Loved this post in all ways!! Many Blessings to you and your fam!

  57. Congrats! My husband is a twin. They have 3 older siblings and then the twins. He loved growing up with a double.

  58. Congratulations!!! I am an identical twin, too. We are 25 now and my twin is pregnant with her first. She’ll be 7 months when I get married in July.

    My mom had a 10 year old boy and a 13 month old baby girl when she had us. Although at 39 weeks my mom had been in bed rest for most of her pregnancy, the doctor allowed her to go on a walk after she pleaded with him. She slipped on a curb and fell and broke her leg from hip to toe. They induced labor and without any drugs, she gave birth to two healthy girls. :) I hope your experience is better than that!! Best of luck to you.

  59. Congrats Abbie! I am an identical twin and to date my sister is my very best friend. She’s the one that I can always count on when I’m down to take my side and listen until I’m done complaining. She’s the one who (even though she lives 3 hours away) can call me and it’s like we haven’t missed a beat.We’ve shared all of life’s joys and sorrows together. So your girls are already so blessed to be born with a best friend!

    Ps My husband and I share your beliefs about bc. And we have 3 girls (6, 4 and 18 mos) to prove it! You’re definitely not a freak!

  60. Abbie, words cannot describe how happy I am for you, and how very special your post today was. Your honesty about mothering (I don’t want to work in the nursery, taking care of other kids, either, but my 4 are everything to me!) being HARD. No one ever says that. Thank you!

    I am excited an honored to take this journey with you! Thank you for sharing with us!

  61. When I was pregnant with my daughter my husband’s cousin (who is a father of twins) said she would be twins. I looked him right in the eye and said, “Then which one are you taking, Don?” I too, have always said that I would die with more than one, because one is so hard! Congratulations to you! Sounds like you’ve been prepared!

  62. Wow – Was that an exciting, unexpected blog to read today. I, too, am inspired by your honesty. I am encouraged by the faith that you and your hubby have put in God regarding the number of children He should bless you with. Your whole life (as we get to see it) is a testimony to your faith and to God’s love for you. Praying that your pregnancy is one that from here on out is boring and uneventful!! That these precious gifts may be born at the proper time in good health, and that they will be a blessing to your family and all those around them. What a great job we are given – to bring these children into the world and then to train them in the way they should go. Blessings to you all!

  63. Congrats!! What a surprise! I always joke that I want twins – two for the price of one means I am pregnant one less time. I loved tour explanation and thought process. I totally understand. Five under seven before you are thirty. Wow! At least you know sometime in the future you will probably look back at this time with fond memories. Just get through one day at a time. Right? I’m going in tommorrow to be induced with #2. I have no idea how I can be a mom to two kids but I hope I can figure it out soon! Good luck and congratulations :)

  64. Wow Abbie, congratulations! I was the nanny for dear friends of ours who had two sets of twins in 18 months! It was crazy and busy and tiring, but it was wonderful and exciting and beautiful at the same time. Those precious babies taught me so much about being a mother to my own 3 boys that later came. Twins are a gift, really. The best way to start off is with a very specific schedule and write things down! It’s so easy to forget who ate/got changed/slept at what time. It will really help! Keep them on the same feeding schedule so you wake up with both of them at the same time (this is where hubby comes in handy for changing, etc!). The more regimented the schedule, the easier it is on both mom and dad and babies, not to mention siblings. Oh, and join the local M.O.M. club…moms of multiples! Very great support system! Looking forward to following your journey!

  65. Oh Abbie, I’m SO thrilled for you! And so thankful that you shared your convictions and beliefs with us. It was a blessing to me. I’m not yet 29 and a momma of four, so yeah, I get you! =) As i think of you I will definitely be praying that your pregnancy continues to be very healthy and that those precious baby girls will be as well. Oh yeah, and I have a friend who thought she was expecting her fourth and it’s her fourth AND fifth as well! =D

    Congrats again!!!!!

  66. As someone who is not married I think it is awesome the path you and your husband have chosen. He is the Lord of all things, even children, though many believers don’t like to admit that. Congratulations!!!!!! and blessings on the months and years ahead.

  67. WOW, I had goose bumps when I saw the sonogram pic, congratulations to you and your family. I didn’t have mulitples but I did have 3 children in less than three years. I remember the tears when I found about our third because my second was still a baby, but everything fell into place and routine was established without any thought really. You will manage and you will have smiles, and you will have tears. Friends of mine recently had twins and when they found out, they were only in the stages of talking about another child or not to have another child. They were shocked and couldn’t imagine, but, they have come thru it just fine. Love reading your blog, keep up the great work here and at home, and much blessings to you.
    Sharon

  68. wow.
    God and i do this dance where whenever i say “i would NEVER …” or “i could NEVER …” lo and behold, it happens. isn’t that just like our God? He takes our “i can’t”s and makes them “He will”s.

    i will be praying for you, your pregnancy and your health!
    (ps i got my shoes and they are fantastic! thanks!)

  69. Congrats and I did gasp when I saw the two babies! Not bc I know you, just a happy blog follower, but because it’s such a beautiful image! God’s blessed you incredibly!

  70. Wow!!! What a blessing!!! I’m expecting my first and I go in for my first ultrasound on Thursday. I’m overly happy for you and as an educator, I understand what parents of plus one go through. I pray that your family is supportive and that God gives you all that you need. I know He will.

    Be blessed, Mommy!

    Chanell Nicole

  71. That is very exciting. God only gives you what he knows you can handle. Take this news one day at a time. Feel blessed that you are able to have children so easily-it isn’t that way for everyone.

  72. God would only entrust you with those precious babies because he knows you are the best Mommy for the job! Congratulations X2 and I can’t wait to follow along in your journey. I already know for sure that they will be two of the most beautiful girls ever, I mean Della X2 are you kidding, cuteness all around!!

  73. Amen, Amen, Amen! And eeeeeeekkkk! That’s me screaming excitement for you all the way from Kentucky. Congrats mama! God always knows what he is doing. I saw this the other day and it made so much sense for when we feel ill equipped and inadequate to do something (and no- I’m not calling you unimpressive! I think you rock!) . “You might be thinking you’re unimpressive and unqualified. That’s good. God performs the most impressive feats through the most unimpressive people. God likes to wet the wood before he sets it on fire. That way, everybody knows who made it burn” (1 Kings 18:33–38)

  74. Abbie! I am in tears for you. Tears of happiness and anticipation. God bless you and your family! Congratulations! Can hardly wait to meet them.
    Also, love love love the room colors.
    Jeremiah 29:11

  75. Love you girl.. You can do this. God knew what he was doing. You are going to have adorable girls and you will have enough energy to appreciate them, to function, and to properly show-off. Congrats times 2!!

  76. a. I AM OVER THE MOON EXCITED FOR YOU! God makes NO mistakes.
    b. I totally agree on the birth control thing.
    c. I can fully understand what you are saying about God easing us into things….exactly! He has done that for me so many times and in a situation that I should have been freaking out, I had peace, because He’s so gracious like that. :)

    I am so happy for you girl! God is so very good!

  77. My jaw did drop!!! WOW!!! I’m so happy for you!!! Congrats!!

    Thanks for being honest about being a mom… it is so tough! And I know Twins terrify you, but you seem like such a go-getter type of gal, so I bet you will do multiple mommying with gusto! (yeah i know I’m making up words!) :)

  78. first of all, congratulations!

    your honesty about motherhood is refreshing. glad i’m not the only momma who struggles to get through each day. (i am 27 and have three daughters, 5, 2, and 3 months!) so yes, i get those looks in the grocery store also, but sometimes i also get people trying to give me hand. like the man who loaded my giant bag of dog food onto my cart because my infant daughter was squeezed against my chest in her sling.

    but anyway, a girl i knew in high school now has 1-year-old identical TRIPLET daughters! imagine that for just a second! :)

    so congratulations again! i love your blog and i’m looking forward to seeing the twins’ new nursery!

  79. YAY! Congratulations to you and your family! God is so good and he will take care of you. :)

    ~Stephanie

  80. Woo hoo high fives all around!!!!!! Congrats to you Abbie and your hubby and the rest of your family for getting two new little ones. How exciting! Yup, I’m pretty much the person who would squeal with delight at finding out I was having twins, but not thinking fully of what that would mean, would scare me too. I think God only gives us what we can handle and no more, so hang in there because God picked YOU special to raise two more miracles in this world. Even though you don’t think you’re that motherly or care to be around other children etc. (I’m the same way), which is why I work in the birth center helping moms and newborns and not in Pediatrics. Take care and keep us involved of new episodes through your pregnancy.
    -Rachel

  81. You have my sympathies… and congratulations!

    There are no twins in my immediate family, but my great-uncle and aunt had 5 children in 3 years. Twins, a singleton, then another set of twins. My aunt used to joke that she prayed to “catch” consumption, so they’d put her in the sanitarium… kids were NOT allowed to visit.

    However, not only did they all survive, they thrived. Despite poverty and hardship. They were blessed. The bond between them is astonishing!

    I truly wish you well on this journey. Fall down when you have to… there will be many to help you get back up!

  82. I’ll give you an amen to about everthing you said. Including not wanting to trade them.;) I’m about to become a mother of 3, and I seriously wonder how on earth I am going to juggle them. I know plenty that do, but I’m under no illusion that it will be simple. But I also know that I told God that if it were best for our family to have a 3rd, then I would trust Him with that (that was before I fell pregnant the 3rd time). Just keep trusting that He knows your capabilities… and that when you can’t – He CAN. (Sounds kinda cliche, but I believe it).
    Blessings on you and your new precious bundles. And a HUGE congratulations, girl!

  83. Oh my goodness!!!!! That is amazing, congrats!!!!
    Remember, God will never give you more than you can handle! It seems hard but you can do it! HE obviously knows you’re a great mother and can handle these precious little girls!
    If you have to give up something like cooking, cleaning, or blogging after these little girls are born please make it cleaning… i can’t imagine not reading your posts everyday!! :)

  84. Ok, super sorry if I missed this post – I did read the whole thing and some sections twice looking for this, but did you not have a 1st trimester ultrasound? Either to confirm viability around 8 weeks or a nuchal screen at 11-14? Or did you have those and they just missed the second baby? Happens. What a surprise at the anatomy scan for crying out loud.

  85. TWINS!!!! YEAH!!!!! My husband is a twin, and my mother in law loved it. I have no doubt it will be hard but you will do great – after all, you know the One who gave your children to you, and the One who loves YOU more than you will ever know!!

  86. WOW! Double congratulations!! I don’t have any great words of advice, but I have a neighbor who was surprised by twin boys (numbers 4 and 5 for her as well!) and she is doing great. Thanks for your honest post – excited to hear more about your journey. And in the hopes of not sounding trite or overused………Jer. 29:11 :) and Phil 4:13 :)

    So glad the scan showed that everybody looks great and healthy! Have a good day and put your feet up when you can!

  87. Congratulations!!! I would be having the same feelings I found out I was having multiples. I am glad everyone is doing well and is healthy! Best wishes! Megan

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