So…are you sick of hearing about the impending birth of the twins yet?

It’s okay. I wouldn’t blame you a bit if you tuned out until they actually show up, at which point you can ooooh and aaaah over their identical (we’re pretty sure) adorable, wrinkly little red faces…and prepare yourself to hear about every breath, bowel movement, and burp they take/make/do from here ‘til kingdom come.

But at least wait until after today before you zone out, please.

Because, today, we’re talking labor and pregnancy, and I’ve found that there are few things that women like to discuss more than the way their various children managed to make their ways into the world…and there are few things I like to hear about more. 

I don’t know why it is exactly that we women have this universal preoccupation with the concept of pushing children out of our bodies (or having them cut out, as the case may be), considering that, when you read the last 20 words in this sentence, it seems like something you’d never want to talk about again…ever…

But we do.

So, here we go with 5 Things Thursday, the Labor (and pregnancy) Edition.

I’ll start.

1.

Although only my last two were delivered at home with a midwife, I have yet to experience the magical, numbing properties of the epidural. I will be foregoing said magical properties again when I (hopefully) have my twins at home, with the same midwife I used for Simon and Della.

I have my reasons, but I’m okay with your thinking I’m a loony for purposefully experiencing pain when I could do without it. I sometimes think the same thing.

2.

I have yet to bring a child into the world in under 24 hours.

Yes, I start the countdown from the first contraction that I deem to be “real.”

No, I’m not in horrible (physical) pain the entire time. In fact, my hard labors (the part of labor where you can’t think about anything else but when the next contraction will come and how to make it hurt as little as possible) have all been right at 5 hours (which my midwife informs me is short…yay).

I will say, though, that the process of contracting (and contracting and contracting) for 44 hours (1st child), 28 hours (2nd child), and 32 hours (3rd child) is a bit hard on one’s mental stamina and emotional forbearance.

(You become fairly convinced that the stubborn little critter is never coming out).

This is me, finishing up recovering Adelaide’s car seat during about hour #26 or so of (maddening) stalled labor.

P.S. I should add that I’ve never gone into labor before 5 PM, which means at least one sleepless night before I actually get to hold my babies.

3.

I have never thrown up during pregnancy…due to pregnancy.

Meaning: I have had stomach bugs (usually late in the pregnancy), but I have never upchucked from pure, hormonal nausea (neither have I had this reaction yet during labor).

Feel free to hate me.

4.

I have been informed (by a man) that I was “made to have babies,” and told that surrogate mothers make upwards of $40,000 per child delivered to another women’s eager, waiting arms.

Um…thanks, dude, but I think I’ll keep my kids, if you don’t mind.

5.

I have been terrified at various points in my various pregnancies at the prospect of natural labor every single time, except this one.

Despite all the what-ifs and potential complications that come along with delivering twins, I have experienced a supernatural level of peace about the prospect of ours entering the world (Thank you, Jesus!).

Sure, if I think about the actual delivery process too much, I start to get a little skeeved out, but nothing like the blind, stare-at-the-ceiling-in-the-dark-in-bed-at-night-wondering-what-in-the-world-I’ve-gotten-myself-into (again) panic that I’ve experienced at least briefly with all three other kids.

And now for the fun part.

If you feel so inclined, you can share your 5 (or however many) things that make your pregnancy(ies) and labor(s)

unique in the comments section.

And THEN…just for fun, using the background information (including the fact that I am currently 37 weeks pregnant) I’ve given you as a guide, if you WANT, you can guess:

1) When the twins will come (day and time)

2) How long it will take them to do it

After they’re here, I will go back through the guesses, and whoever is the closest all around will win a fun prize (to be determined).

Ready, steady, GO!

 

 

6 Comments

  1. I had that mouth-watering disorder with both of my boys and had to walk around everywhere with a cup so I could spit. I felt like an old, western cowboy… ugh!

    I cannot believe you were making something during labor!!! You kill me!

    I hope this one goes well and smoothly!!!

  2. Short version of L & D stories for my 2 daughters & 2 sons. From 1st OUCH pains to final pushes – 18 hours total labor. No epidural. No nothing. (Sorry about the double negative.) I begged for epidural, but was told ALL 4 times that I was too close to delivery.
    Abbie, you’ll have the twins Wednesday, September 12th after a brief 21 hours of labor. Don’t let this confident claim fool you. I almost always lose at guessing games. Make no mistake, early or late, they will be born on time. The Lord’s calendar is marked.

  3. All of my babies were born without pain meds. I went to the hospital the first time thinking that it would have to hurt pretty bad for me to be willing to let someone puncture my spine with a huge needle. It wasn’t that bad so I didn’t. I also have identical girls. I also never threw up during labor, though I came close once when someone brought peanut butter into the room. I always gave birth during daylight hours.
    And I think your girls will arrive on Sept. 13 at around 7 am after 18 hours of labor.
    Diane W

  4. Been checking regularly to see if they’re here yet! 😀 jealous by the way. I’d take a set of twins if God thought I could handle it! I only have one (so far). She was born a week late and took about 19 hours to make her grand and noisy entrance but that was because my water hadn’t broken all the way til a couple hours before she was finally born… Now I know and you better believe I’ll make sure it’s all the way torn next time!! It was a long slow day! I also had no pain meds, no IV, no nothin. It was great to not be tied down! I never even had the shot after like they usually give to stop bleeding. I think my body liked being pregnant too. Only ever threw up once but only because it was early morning and I brushed too far back on my toung. 🙂 I feel bad for those who can’t stop throwing up durring labor. They say I have a high tolerance for pain… All in all, would do it again!

    Ok, so here’s my guess… Sept 19, 5:01 P.M. 28 hours…

  5. 5 things that might not be very unique, but that I can think to share are:
    1. I never tnrew up either. Sometimes the queezy-ness mzde me wish I could, just to get it over with, but I never did actually vomit.
    2. I loved being pregnant. Sure I complained like none other, and totally drove my poor husband crazy, But I loved how it felt to be a part of something so miraculous.
    3. I thought all along my first pregnancy that if I got to the delivery room, and felt like “Oh, hey I can totally do this without drugs.” I’d just go ahead and have that baby without them. Uhhh, that did NOT happen. 🙂
    4. We didn’tfind out the sex of either one of oir babies until they were born. It was toally myhusband’s idea, andhe had to talk me into it the first time around. But it was fun to be surprised. I’m thinking next time, though it might befun to find out!
    5. This was really fun, thanks for reminding me how much fun it wasgobecome a Mama! P.S. my nameis Chalyce. And both of theze posts are from me. Hope you have a quick and easy delivery, and that having twins will be WAY more fun than more dfficult. WhichI’m sure it willbe!

  6. I’ve been readingyour lovely blog here for about 6 months. I look forward to it everyday at naptime, when my 3 yr old daughter, and 1yr old son have a rest. I love the way you write, it feels like we’re buds visiting and chatting like we’ve known each other for ages. 🙂 You make me laugh, and calm my nerves for “round two” of my day, so thanks!
    You’re totally rigt about us women loving to share our unique tales of how we entered into this wonderful, crazy, tantrum, teething, and potty training – filled blessing we call motherhood.

I love hearing from you guys!