You asked. I attempted to answer (Part II)

If you already read Part I, then you already know what Part II is about, so let’s just jump right in, shall we?

{Just be warned that, if you thought last time was long, holy cow! Several more questions rolled in, and this one is a doozy, y’all}

I’d love to hear how to deal with some of the more negative sides of pregnancy with so much (seeming) ease on your blog. Varicose veins, exhaustion, homebirth nay-sayers, etc.

My (seeming) ease on the blog definitely has a lot to do with the fact that this is not an acceptable place for me to vent. Sure, I am as honest as possible, but I am not here to complain. My husband gets an earful every now and then, so just know that, just because I don’t say it here, it doesn’t mean that nothing ever bothers me.

HOWEVER, in answer to your specific topics:

  • VARICOSE VEINS ARE FROM THE DEVIL. Oh. my. word. I DESPISE them. I never really had them before the twins (just a few light blue lines in the back of my right leg), but they’ve progressively gotten worse and worse until they hurt like the Dickens, and I’ve stopped wearing shorts or “shorter” skirts of any kind because it literally looks like my right leg is diseased (yippee!). My mom says that Bilberry is a good supplement to take, and my midwife recently told me about Butcher’s Broom, which is supposed to help a lot, so I’ll be ordering both of those very soon. I used to take a Vitamin K supplement, which I need to get back to. Just lazy, I guess.
  • EXHAUSTION IS ALSO FROM THE DEVIL…but a good reminder that I truly cannot do it all while I’m pregnant. I have given myself so much grace the last two pregnancies to nap as much as possible, even if it means telling Ezra and Simon that they may put on Peppa Pig for the twins and Della while Theo sleeps, and they are required to read quietly in the room with them while I lie down for 45 minutes. Much harder to do when you have little bitties, but chances are, they take naps, and I’ve learned to just lie down when they lie down, regardless of the laundry piling up. Also, I drink It Works Greens–a natural source of fruits, veggies, fiber, and energy. It helps.
  • HOME BIRTH is awesome. I don’t like the pain, but I LUUUUUURVE being in my own bed holding my wee babe. I have never for a moment felt unsafe, and I know that, if a complication arises, my midwife will be very swift to send me to the hospitable 10 minutes away. Maybe it’s because of where I live (conservative, family-friendly area), but I haven’t dealt with too many naysayers. I do know that my mother-in-law, who is a nurse, gets some flack from her colleagues and will sometimes come to me with questions. I just answer them and tell her to tell them to mind their own business (nicely, of course). :)
I’d like to know about having more kids. What’s it like? How much more does each child bring of chaos and stress. I’m really hoping to have more, so just any and all info on adding another child and large families in general.

Hmm…there’s this adjustment period every time we have a new kid that feels both strangely peaceful and insanely chaotic. We don’t know what our new normal is, but we’re also not doing nearly as much as we usually do because, hello, new baby.

There are usually a few nights in a row whose soundtrack is: “Y’all gon’ make me lose my mind…up in here..up in here.” For real.

Pretty quickly, though, new routines start to emerge. And patterns of behavior that are causing either chaos or order become clear. We tweak. We adjust. We lose our tempers. We apologize. We extend grace. And then, sooner than you’d think, we adjust to the new normal that is however many kids, and it’s all good.

Notice I did NOT say “easy.” Because #hardisnotthesamethingasbad

Also, the younger they all are, the crazier it is. Because they’re soooooo neeeeeedy. I find myself in a really sweet spot at the moment of having two (almost three; Della’s getting closer) really helpful, sweet, thoughtful older kids who are a genuine source of support and encouragement to me. They’re not perfect. But then, neither am I. And most days, I can rattle off a list of what they need to do, and they just get it done (after I repeat several items on the list several times, of course. They’re still boys).

A perfect example would be the homeschool co-op I mentioned on Monday. The first morning was pretty hectic and crazy-making, even though we’d prepared the night before. The second time was better, but I still had to do a lot of reminding. This week was thisclose to perfect. Everybody knew what was expected, and Ezra asked me multiple times: “Mama, what else can I do to help?” Next week, hopefully, we’ll have Simon and Della on board, and we’ll be golden.

It’s a constant process of adjustment, give and take, and recalibration. It’s far from perfect. But it’s definitely doable. Joyful, even! (Some days…should be all days…but just keepin’ it real).

From your blog posts you always seem to be so patient and calm— how do you do it?! Can you share how are you able to juggle homeschooling, housework– cooking, laundry, cleaning, organizing, etc. with teaching aerobics, grocery shopping, just motherhood and all that comes with it?! Do you have a large circle of support from family, friends, babysitter? I have 4 kids and there are so many days that I feel so impatient exhausted and overwhelmed. I sometimes feel that I am just on survival mode. Would love to hear how you manage everything. Do your kids play sports that you are required to chauffeur them around? What meals do you prepare and can you start sharing more on your blog or Facebook, recipes? Thank you so very much.

Like whoa. That was a lot of questions, girl. ;)

But good ones. So, here I go…laughing all the way because a) NO, I am NOT always calm and patient and b) I had no idea that was the impression I gave on my blog.

I lose my temper, same as anyone else. But I find that, if I’ve had a decent amount of sleep, taken the time to do Bible reading, and EATEN (huge for me; I have issues with “hang-er”…”h-anger?” I have no idea how to spell that so it doesn’t look a) weird or b) like something you should put clothes on), I can usually deal with most of the crazy in at least a semi-gentle (sometimes full on kind; sometimes all I can manage is business-like) way.

I have major triggers. For example, getting out of the door with 6 kids is always challenging, but I expect that, and it doesn’t bother me too much. HOWEVER. If I’m late, and the twins (it’s usually the twins) decide to have a meltdown as we walk out the door, I turn into Nazi-Mom, barking orders, and doling out discipline willy-nilly. So…I try (oh, how I try) to avoid those triggers. Some days, it’s unavoidable, and I do okay. Sometimes, I lose it and have to apologize. But “knowing thy (my) self” (what brings out the mean mama in me) and PRAYER are about the only things that help me keep it together on those overly emotional days when it feels like every screech is an ice pick to the brain (and then, there are 3 days in a row that are totally zen, and I start to feel like I’ve really got this mama-ing thing licked…which is pretty much the moment when the Lord lowers the humble boom and shows me just how much I have yet to learn).

In answer to the rest of your questions: HERE’S THE THING. I do NOT do it all. Not really. But I genuinely do not feel crazy most of the time either. Mostly because I keep it simple.

Yes, I cook. Yes, I clean (with help from my kids). Yes, I home school (although, we’re doing the co-op, AND my mom’s helping again this year, so I won’t have as much…except that the twins are starting preschool work, so…yeah…we’ll see). Yes, I exercise. But I do NOT: volunteer anywhere (not anymore, anyway), attend a Bible study, always take a daily shower (#ew), attend a MOPS group, or….insert any number of things that lots of other moms do that I just don’t. My life is pretty basic: home, husband, kids, family, friends, church, gym, blog (oh, and then there’s that whole building a house and running a business thing, but let’s not talk about those right now, m’kay?). When I complicate it beyond that, things get wonky. (See the last two I mentioned + being pregnant; oy!).

I naturally struggle with physical (as opposed to time) organization (slowly but surely getting better as I get rid of more and more stuff), so I have to keep that SUPER-basic. There’s always at least one legitimately messy room in my house (usually my bedroom, where all of the extra stuff that doesn’t have a true home goes to die). And I have plenty of unfinished projects that have been waiting on my attention for ages.

All of the things that I seem to do well and/or effortlessly are my strong points. Of course, I’m going to seem good at those. I like to exercise. I’m a good (albeit simple) cook, and I spend a lot of time training my children, so we get along well and keep the house in okay shape most of the time.

But for every thing I’m good at, there are ten that escape me. And I’m just over here marveling at what Y’ALL do: cleaning your baseboards and windows regularly (whuuuutt?), making your own kombucha, gardening, doing really fun/creative projects with your kids, reading 3 educational books a month, crocheting, learning a new skill, getting dressed in real clothes every day (ha!), etc.

We all have strengths and weaknesses, and I’ve learned to play to mine and let the rest go to the extent that it’s not laziness (although, sometimes, there’s some laziness involved).

As far as meals, here are a lot of my go-tos plus great suggestions in the comments.

As far as kid recreational activities: yes, we have a few. So far: piano and soccer…for all three older kids. They don’t seem to mind the sameness one bit and have expressed zero interest in doing something different. Heaven help us when the day comes that they do.

As far as a support circle: I don’t use regular babysitters (as long as you don’t count the gym childcare) or nannies, but my mom is an angel and takes my big kids home with her one night a week (they’ve been doing this since they were each 2, respectively). My in-laws are also very sweet and will take the older kids or even all of them on the weekend occasionally. So, while I’m rarely without ANY kids unless I’m teaching an exercise class, I still consider myself blessed with help.

How do you discipline your kids?

Such a loaded, loaded question. Y’all be nice, okay?

So, I think this question has more to do with teaching them to do right rather than punishment (based on the fact that it was attached to another question that seemed to imply this). As in: how do you teach your children to be disciplined?

And I just have to return to training. And repetition. And NEVER growing weary of doing good.

Yes, we have to punish. We do spank (especially when they’re younger), use timeout, and take away privileges (especially when they’re older). We also talk about the “heart” of the matter (the why of the action and the sin that’s causing it) all. the. flipping. time.

I have zero interest in raising robot children who “follow the rules” by rote without ever thinking about why they’re doing it or who they’re doing it for (the Lord, others, themselves, in that order), only to discover, 15 years later, that they don’t have any reason to continue.

As far as the practical nitty-gritties, this one is huge for us: TERMS OF RESPECT.

Our children are required to say Yes/No Ma’am/Sir to every single adult they encounter. They are required to say “May I please” and, “Thank you” when they ask for/receive something. And they are required to make eye contact with the person with whom they’re speaking. “Yeah,” and “Okay” and “No,” are not acceptable responses. And they are required to do all of this with a cheerful attitude, instead of a sullen one.

Some of you are probably thinking: “Basic.”

Others are going: “Dude, they’re hardcore.”

Shaun is originally from the North where the Ma’ams and Sirs aren’t as much a thing as in the South, and he was originally skeptical of my wanting to do this. But now he’s TOTALLY on board.

Because here’s the thing that we have found with our children: respectful speech often dictates respectful actions. (It’s like that whole bit in James 3 about the tongue being like the small rudder that controls the whole big ship).

A slouchy, grouchy, “Yeah, Mom,” is often followed by dragging the feet and whining about a chore.

A cheerful, “Yes Ma’am,” is often followed by swift execution, which makes us all happier because I don’t have to nag or punish, and they’re done with the task more quickly.

It’s such a simple thing, but it is SO hard to train because it takes so. much. repetition. Once they’ve got it, though, I notice a difference/improvement in both behavior and attitude almost immediately. (I’m already starting to train Theo to say “Yes ma’am,” and he’s hilariously resistant, the little sinner).

Between talking about doing things “as unto the Lord” all the time and striving to address each other respectfully, I don’t have TOO many issues that need actual punishment with the older ones these days (usually just a bit of “come to Jesus” attitude recalibration). The youngers are another story (as noted above, Theo is juuuuuust getting into his “expressing my independence stage,” and it’s both fun and “fun”), but I believe they’ll get there.

Have you dealt with any jealousy among the younger ones yet? Also how do you get your little ones to sleep through the night when you nurse? We are at the brink of 11 months and my not so little guy refuses to sleep through the night which makes this mommy exhausted with a 3 and 8 year-old during the day.

Nope, no jealousy yet, thank the Lord. I’ve had my worries before, but they’ve never come to fruition. My kids fight, sure, but they also really, genuinely like each other–again–thank the Lord.

Oh, and here’s the post I wrote on my go-to sleep-training tips (most are too young for him, but maybe you’ll see something that helps).

What is your stance on sleepovers?

Honestly? Not a big fan. I would make exceptions for close, trusted friends/family, but I remember all too well some of the junk that I was exposed to (that still sticks in my brain 25 years later…close your eyes, Mom!) that I wish I hadn’t seen at such an early age (or ever) on sleepovers.

We haven’t had to address it hardly at all (yet), but we will do so prayerfully and as Biblically as we can when the situation arises.

I’ve got a bunch of little kids (4 to be exact, with the oldest at age 6). When, do you feel like is the turning point for their going from helpless to genuinely helpful?

Side note: when I read this, I think, “Oh, Mama. You are one busy woman. Bless you.” And then, I remember, “Duh. I have 4, 5 and under, and will soon have 5, 6 and under.” Ha! It really does help to have a couple of older ones to balance out my perspective, though.

I think the magic number for us has been between 6 and 7. They’re still pretty limited on tasks, but they’re able to communicate well and see problems that need solving like: Mom needing helps carrying things to the car. They also start to take a little more initiative and ownership of their responsibilities around that age. But, of course, your mileage may vary. You might get a very early or late bloomer.

It ever hard to say “we are open to as many babies as God sends us.”? I hate being asked “so are you done?” or “this is the last one right?” I also cringe at my own embarrassment at answering this question. Maybe I need to just practice saying it so I can answer the question and move on! It seems I always stand there stammering and embarrassed trying to defend or explain our family. Oi! It’s a joy to follow your blog. Keep up the good work mama!

I get it, girl.  I do. But I don’t mind being asked the question because I’ve begun to see it as an opportunity (that I wouldn’t normally get) to tell people about the Lord. I understand the cringing, though, because it’s hard not to project what we assume people are thinking of us (cuh-razy) onto their expected reaction once we tell them. I usually just say, “No, we’re not done…at least as far as we know. We leave the ultimate number up to God, so we’ll see how it goes!” Insert big smile. I haven’t yet met a person who will respond (outwardly) negatively to that response. They very well may be thinking, “You’re nuts,” or, “Glad it’s you and not me,” and that’s fine. But at least I’ve had a chance to give the Lord the credit, and eeeeeevery now and then, it leads to something more meaningful.

What are your reasons for homeschooling? I have homeschooled and now we are trying public school. I would homeschool 100% but I feel like my sanity is an issue! But I totally love homeschooling! So tell me your perspective please!

I feel like my sanity is an issue!” This made me laugh.

We home school because we genuinely believe that, for our family, it is the best and most effective way to raise lights in a darkened world. THAT is my primary goal in education–not math, reading, writing, or history. Although, OF COURSE, we teach all of those diligently, and I believe that God made our brains to soak up the knowledge of all of the goodness and order with which he imbued his creation.

I believe that, as their mother, I am called to be the primary influencer of their learning, and I don’t know how to do that if they’re gone 8 hours a day.

We also love the flexibility it provides our large family to spend lots of unstressed time together and to explore God’s creation/take trips at odd times of year/keep going during the summer (which we did at a more relaxed pace this summer).

There’s also so much opportunity for tailoring each child’s education to his/her own learning needs AND the opportunity to speed ahead in areas of strength and take your time in areas of weakness.

I know homeschooling is not for everyone, but we love it (yes, the kids too!), and it’s truly ideal for us.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Aaaaand I’m out…of words, thoughts, ideas…all of it.

Well. Almost. There was one question that I’ll address in its own blog post, but for now, I think I’m done.

{Doesn’t mean I won’t answer more in the comments if you think of more}

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34 thoughts on “You asked. I attempted to answer (Part II)

  1. Hi Abbie, thanks for doing this question/answer session. I am enjoying it. Totally off subject, but I recall you writing a list of books for kids. I can’t seem to find it doing a search. I am looking for interesting books for my daughter (age 7) related to the middle ages time period. Didn’t you have something like that listed? Thank you!

  2. All I can say is WOW! Just when I think I can’t admire you more, you do it again! This is one of those posts where the comments and your answers to them are just as interesting as the post itself! You are awesome Abbie. Great job and beautiful family!

  3. Wow, I don’t envy you these questions! I DO envy you your apparently very-welcoming-to-”failed”-home-births “hospitable”, however! Any I’ve used tend to be veeeeeeery edgy around a home birth-planning mom. : ) I’m also thrilled to meet another the-master-bedroom-is where-all-the-stuff-goes-to-die person. WHAT IS WITH MASTER BEDROOMS?!?

  4. I have never commented on your blog or any blog before (yikes…so here it goes) I am truly amazed at the many similarities in our families. I am 33, ️️️️mama to seven (10, 8, 6, 4, 2,2, and two months) yep, I have twins too!! i homeschool, love Jesus, like to exercise (in my garage gym…props to you for getting them all loaded up in the afternoon) love home birth, kids do piano and soccer (and summer swimming), and speak fluent Spanish. I do NOT, however, decorate or have any fashion sense. Your blog has been so encouraging and reminds me that I am
    NOT alone on my journey… living differently than most American families. I know you said you don’t do it all, but girl, you are doing a lot!! I know you all must be some Crazy hard workers, using your time and talents wisely. Amen to hard does not equal bad. My husband reminds me of that during some of my evening breakdown sessions. Thanks again for using your gift of writing to encourage other mamas and speak truth! Much love from a fellow crazy ️️️️mama in Virginia!

    1. Aili, you cannot possibly know how much this encouraged me in a very down moment on a very heavy afternoon. I am honored to be your first blog comment ever. Made my day!

  5. Whoa, all of this is sooo helpful! Would you consider doing a part three, or an entire post, that elaborates on discipline? This can be one of the harder areas of parenting, I think. When you answered questions about this in this post, you talked about how (spank, time out, take-away, etc) and what’s required. But it would be so interesting to know more about the application details… for example, when do you spank the younger ones versus just give time out (are there different levels of misbehavior you consider? Like, if they hit or disobey an instruction, do they get spanked immediately? But if they are just fussy, you give a time-out?) Do you give a warning first and then only spank if you have to tell them twice? How to you get them to obey/follow the requirements you set for them, like in showing respect for example? You mentioned that it takes lots of repetition… but do you at some point start spanking as they immediately do not follow the expectation?

    I have a young one year old and he is my first babe… I consider you such an excellent model of the kind of parent that I want to be and the kind of family I want to raise. I agree with the methods of discipline you apply and the expections you have.. So I would love some more details on how/when to apply the discipline in order to get the results we are expecting/hoping for!

    1. Hey Courtney,

      I’d happily do a Round III if it were warranted, but I don’t think I’m prepared to go into the specifics of how we discipline on the blog. It’s just too touchy and easily misinterpreted subject. Feel free to shoot me a private message at blogabbie@gmail.com, though (you can just copy and paste what you wrote here), and I’ll respond.

  6. I’ll throw you a random question…I was raised in a Christian household and am strong Christian too. My father was a pastor and I remember him teaching me at very young age after overhearing someone someone say it, that “holy cow” was not an ok thing to say. It’s never been an expression I’ve used , I never say “holy…. cow or crap or insert whatever word fits here” because I just feel like holy is a special word, set apart if you will! Ain’t nothing holy about crap, or cows even!
    The way children speak is so important.
    What are your thoughts on this?

    1. Hi Merrilee,

      I think you have a really valid point–one I agree with. What we say is SO important. We don’t use, “Holy crap,” or even “crap” at all in our house (holy or not). For whatever reason, in my mind, “Holy Cow” is in a different category altogether because it seems so much less crass. Same with “Gee” and “Geez.” They both have the same roots–if you really think about it–in “Jesus,” which we would never use an exclamation, of course. But “Gee” reminds me of wholesome innocence a la The Andy Griffith Show, whereas Geez has a considerably more worldly connotation, both in use and tone. I’m not trying to be inconsistent or split hairs or even argue at all. I just think that we probably all have phrases that *could* have potentially questionable roots that we use UNquestioningly because, in our own minds, they are not meant in a derogatory way at all. And those phrases (the “innocent” ones) will probably differ from person to person. Ultimately, while I think context does have a bearing on this discussion, we should all do our absolute best to “let no unwholesome word come out of our mouths” but instead be only pleasing and edifying to the Lord/others. It’s good food for thought.

  7. Loved reading it! Thanks for working hard to answer so many questions!
    “(I’m already starting to train Theo to say “Yes ma’am,” and he’s hilariously resistant, the little sinner).” – my favorite line, by far!

  8. Thanks for your honesty on so many topics, Abbie! It is really encouraging to read your perspective (and others’ too, in the comments) on motherhood. You are an inspiration! And now I don’t feel bad about not cleaning my baseboards/windows regularly

          1. Tineke! I love you! Thank you so much for trying so hard to leave a complete comment. I appreciate what you did manage to say. Dumb technology! :)

  9. About the “being done” question…..I currently have six, ages are 12, 8, 6, 5, 2, 4 months. I get asked this A LOT! I can say about myself that as much as I feel overwhelmed at times, (bringing home a newborn/taking everyone for a teeth cleaning/sickness), I know that I know I simply cannot say “no” to more. I was never one to want a large family, bunch of kids, or a certain number of each gender. I actually don’t ever remember thinking about even having kids lol! I assumed I would but would never have believed God would gift us 6 babies here on earth and 2 with Him! After the birth of my second baby The Lord really started doing a work in my and my husbands hearts about children. To make a long story short we gave our family size to God. We have yet to be disappointed even with our miscarriages! His plans are truly greater than anything I could ever plan for myself or my family. Is it always easy? No. Do I freak out to a certain degree with each positive pregnancy test? Yes! (I’m getting better though lol)! At the end of the day it’s about dying to myself more and more each day and truly learning how to SERVE and seeing how much better He knows me than I know myself. This is just my personal experience I’m certainly not trying to persuade anyone either way.

    1. Oh man, Autumn. I am seriously cheering over here. Outside of knowing that I would probably have lota of kids because we were open to them and weren’t using birth control from the beginning, everything you said sounded like it came out of my head. Keep on, Mama. You have encouraged me today.

      1. I appreciate you putting your convictions out there and not watering life down. I’m also encouraged from hearing another momma with a similar family to mine!

  10. I’m a homeschooling mama to three and share many of your loves….Jesus, hubby, kiddos, good food, decor, & just built a house. (Oh how I wish I could add exercising here!

    1. Whoops, lost the last part of my comment. It said something to the effect of I’ve really enjoyed reading all these answers. They’re like a little behind the scenes peek into many of the things you write about. I’m having trouble with the link to your go-to recipes. I sure would like to check those out!

  11. I really liked reading your answer to that long multi-question in the middle. I love to read blogs about other (big) families, but it really does cause me to have lots of despairing thoughts about my own inadequacy, so I have to be careful and keep reminding myself that these are people just like us… So your answer up there is so relatable– getting-out-of-the-house meltdowns, being a much better mommy with food and sleep, etc. It just helps me feel a little more normal. Also, I like your discipline thoughts. I do a lot of those same things, but it’s helpful to read other people’s “big picture” thoughts to refine my own.

  12. Abbie, I am new to your blog and have been loving it! You are such an inspiration and so very blessed. Heather…..I know it is hard but keep on trusting God he will never give us more than we can handle. I have had so many women tell me that I wish I would have had more with such true sadness about it. Pregnancy and early postpartum are those sneaky times when we feel most tempted to just say enough.

  13. I know some people who have had success using essential oils for vericose veins. That might be something you want to look into

  14. Girl – get with your It Works friend and try defining gel if you haven’t already. I have heard that it works wonders on varicose veins

    1. I have some! I just don’t want to “waste” it on pregnancy because, as long as I have as much extra blood flowing in my body as I do while pregnant, the veins are going to bulge (the gel only works on the appearance of veins; not on the {mal}function of them), so I want to wait until my blood flow is back to normal so I can get optimal results…if that makes sense.

  15. Ok… Here is my odd one. We currently have four kids, and I’m not sure we’re done either. We haven’t used birth control since the first year or our marriage- after which I was convicted about it and also because it made me hormonallly craaaazy. We had issues getting pregnant – took years to conceive our first, and has three losses along the way. So I am Hesitant to ever say we’re “done” …. So long winded question. Do you think you’ll ever be done, spiritually physically emotionally? And then what? Do I get my tubes tied? Does he get a vasectomy? Are we just really careful lol? Just wondering what your thoughts are. It’s such a difficult topic. Honestly with each kid He’s teaching me my selfishness and need to die to self so… Maybe I need to fifth to “master” that

    1. Do you ever get tempted to say, maybe 7 will be enough? We are prego with number 7 as well, and I keep feeling swamped. We are homeschooling too, but we have already done only half days a few times this year ( since August 1st). I feel like I am not spending enough time with each younger child on some days, because I am so focused on getting school work done with the oldest 3. I don’t know if it is the enemy trying to tell me enough kiddos already, but I so wonder why other mamas don’t feel the same conviction sometimes that seems so obvious to me. Trusting God in all areas, I mean, including our number of kids. Sorry if that is too loaded of a question.Thank you for your thoughts! Oh, and my kids are currently 10, 6, 5, 3, 2, 6 months, and due in March.

      1. Hi Abbie!
        As you are writing your post in response to this question, I was hoping you might consider including your thoughts on how you handle decision making in general? There isn’t anywhere in His Word about who specifically should be our mate, where we should live, what career we should choose, how many children to have, etc (normally–there are exceptions in Scripture). These are all important decisions for us, and yet God has not given us specific direction in these areas, as well as many other areas of life in which we find ourselves with a choice. With that in mind, are non-moral kinds of decisions an issue of freedom in the life of a Christian all the time, some of the time, none of the time? Since God’s word doesn’t give us specific instructions on these issues, how do you think He wants us to make these decisions? I absolutely do feel that being ‘done’ is our call. He has given us the freedom to make that choice, given that we do so within the biblical principles he has revealed to help us make wise decisions. I would be interested in your thoughts when considering it through this framework. :)

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