Wardrobe Wednesday: Trendy

I mentioned doing a little “retail research” in yesterday’s post.

And in my world, when I say “retail research,” I mean “a trip to Target.”

Because we’re fancy like that.

Honestly, I inspired by another Target trip (seriously, that was my belly?!) in which I mentioned poking fun at current trends.

And then I thought about it and realized I hadn’t actually tried on any of those trends, nor was I going to at that point (38+ weeks pregnant).

So, in the interest of fairness to the most faddish of fads, the twins and I stopped at Target and did a whirlwind inventory of current trends.

During that inventory, using extremely scientific methods, I discovered that the following things are very in:

• Skinny jeans; I mean, duh, they’re practically a third candidate for the presidency, their prevalence is so complete. But whether or not they succeed in world dominance, they have definitely taken over the Target women’s clothing department. I seriously couldn’t turn around without being confronted with yet another stretchy, skinny-legged pair of pants.
• Patterns—above all, florals and animals prints. Especially when they appear on skinny jeans.
• COLOR (you’d think this would make me very happy, but even I got a little overwhelmed)
• Leather (or a vague facsimile thereof)
• Boxy, cropped tops
• Peplum
• Color-blocking 

After one trip in which I took only my allotted 6 items, tried them on, took pictures, put them all back on the hangers, got redressed in the clothes I came in, and hauled the twins back to the counter to get more clothes, I managed to sweet-talk the nice dressing room attendant into letting me take back the entire pile of remaining “research.”

I had to suppress a pretty decent amount of guilt that I was making extra work for her with no real intention of buying anything from the pile, but the joint wasn’t exactly hopping, so I finally decided that she would ultimately thank me for helping her shift go by faster by keeping her busy and left it at that.

Ahem.

Anyway, here are the pairings I came up with (keep in mind that I pretty much did one big sweep through the store and grabbed anything I thought was relevant in a size that I thought might fit; there’s a pretty good chance some of these trends would have gotten fairer treatment if I had been able to more thoughtfully combine pieces; okay, end disclaimer).

First up, the outfit I wore to Target:

I don’ think of myself as a trend-follower, so it made me smile when I realized that I’m wearing a version of one of the trends on my list: peplum. I bought that top (from Target) when I was pregnant, but now that I see it on a “normal” body, I’m realizing that I’m pretty much wearing a little skirt around my waist. Hmm…

Also, I’ve got on my uber-popular J.Crew bubble necklace knock-off that I finally broke down and bought. I tell you what! I’m practically a trend-slave!

And now for the research:

Outfit #1

THE TREND: Florals. Plus more peplum. PLUS.—bonus—my skirt has wings.

CONCLUSION: If you ever want both your waist and hips to look instantly wider, add fluttery ruffles of fabric. It’ll do the trick quick..

Outfit #2

THE TREND: Animal print + color

CONCLUSION: I was absolutely right when I thought, “Hmm, this is about as far out of my comfort zone as I can get. I’m pretty sure I saw Christina Aguilera wearing this dress on The Voice (without the tank underneath, of course).

Outfit #3

THE TREND: Leather (+ tweed, which is another big thing apparently)

CONCLUSION: Pleather leggings are surprisingly comfortable, and…I’m pretty sure that thing I’m wearing on top is supposed to be a dress. GULP!

Outfit #4

THE TREND: More floral + more leather

CONCLUSION: 1993 called. It wants its sunflowers back. Plus, it’s a little worried about your ankle circulation.

Outfit #5

THE TREND: Color blocking

CONCLUSION: Not too bad if I had a 9-5ish kind of job.

Outfit #6

THE TREND: Boxy, cropped top; pattern mixing, patterned skinny jeans

CONCLUSION: If I ever decide to go skiing with a bunch of 3rd-graders, I’m totally wearing this.

Outfit #7

THE TREND: Colored skinny jeans in the trendiest of all trendy shades for fall—Oxblood; nature-themed patterns; cropped tops

CONCLUSION: That baby in the background sure is cute!

Outfit #8

I like to call this next one the 4 Stages of Floral Harem Pants:

Stage 1: Shock

{Dude, I’m wearing my grandma’s p.j. pants from 1948, and apparently, I’m allowed to go out in public like this if I want}

Stage 2: Chagrin

{Oh man, did I really just post these pictures on my blog, and while wearing peplum, no less?}

Stage 3: Justification

{Oh well, I guess there are worse things I could be wearing; at least I’m not wearing those leather hot pants that sign back there assured me were super-hot right now}

Stage 4: Indignation

{Oh heck no! I’m wearing pleated floral nightwear. These are coming off now!}

Outfit #9

THE TREND: Hot mess

CONCLUSION: This is what happens when you combine the last three items from your pile, and they happen to be: your great-aunt Mildred’s tweed jacket she wears to play Mahjong with “the girls,” a tank top the color of day-old oatmeal, and light-colored skinny jeans with mold growing all over them.

……………………………………………

So, what did I discover from my {very thorough} experiment?

That there’s a reason I’m not a very trendy person (did you see how wide the pant-legs were in my outfit from home??)

I can definitely see some people pulling off some of these looks better than I, but ultimately, I only ended up with one look that I actually would have even seriously considered wearing out of the store.

Can you guess which one it was?

And what about you guys?

Do you like to rock the trends, or are you more of a free spirit (or traditionalist) when it comes to fashion?